The summer of 2009 should have been one of the happiesttimes of my life. This was the summer wefinally purchased and built our very first home. And while that is exciting, I will alwaysremember that summer for very different reasons.
That summer is when I faced the hard, cold truth and realityslapped me in the face. You see, upuntil that point in my life I had been really good at ignoring my weightproblem. I had been great at pretendingI was happy. I had moved past a lot ofanger I had from horrible situations from my past. But deep down, I didn’t feel I deserved to behappy. Ultimately, crap happens ineveryone’s lives. Mine was no exception! I went many years, feeling I didn’t deserveto look good. Or I didn’t deserve to behappy.
The summer of 2009 was the final straw. This is me in the summer of 2009.
Some might ask why I would share such an unflatteringpicture with the blog world. There isone HUGE reason. Because I never, NEVERwant to forget how I felt this exact day!
I woke up, as usual, in my brand new bedroom, in my brandnew house. I went to get dressed. I stood in my closet. I searched. I went to my drawers. I searchedsome more. Typically, I would grab asweatshirt and comfy pants, but it was a hot 110-degree day and I knew I wouldroast. So I kept looking.
That’s when the tears started. Everything I pulled out to try on wasn’t evenclose to fitting! I sat there, in mycloset, disappointed and discouraged. Eventually,at the very top of my closet I saw a box labeled “maternity clothes.” I knew what was in that box. And with tears streaming down my face Iopened the box and grabbed my maternity capris, and the purple maternity shirtto go with them.
I was humiliated.
I was so large that even my size 20’s in my closet…you know,my “fat pants” didn’t fit! I had to gofor the stretchy waisted maternity clothes, and those were tight.
After I gained composure, I put on my “everything is great”face. I went down to play the wii withthe kids. Yet again, pretending that itdidn’t bother me. But when I see thatpicture above, I see the pain and embarrassment hiding deep down in that girl! I never want to forget that feeling becausethose emotions are what continue to scare me straight!
233.9 was the highest recorded weight for me. And slowly I started chipping away at thatnumber...again! You see I had triedumpteen times to lose weight. I’d triedLA Weightloss, Atkins, HCG, juicing fasts, etc, etc, etc. Myprogress was slow. I got down to about207 and found out I was pregnant with my youngest. While we were thrilled, I also knew thismeant I would be gaining back what I had been trying to lose. Thankfully, by the time I delivered in April2011 I was only back up to 222.
That is when the real work began. That summer I knew I had to dosomething. That summer I knew I had thechance to change.
So, I began walking.Not outside….I was a hermit and too embarrassed about mysize!
Not on a treadmill….we couldn’t afford one.
Not at the gym…my husband was working thousands of milesaway from us and I had no family near to use as babysitters. (Plus, we couldn’t afford a membership.) (Plus, I was a hermit…remember?)
So I began walking inside my house.Sound silly? Yeah. I know it does.
But that’s what I did.
I literally had a wiiFit step board and would step on andoff that board thousands of times a day. Before the kids woke up, I’d try and get in 45 minutes. When the kids went outside to play, I’d sneakin 30 minutes. When the kids went downfor the night, I’d turn on my favorite TV shows and step up and down as Iwatched them. I told myself there was NOTV unless I was stepping.
And that is what I did all summer long.
By the time my husband came home from training, he wascoming home to a new wife. By the end ofAugust I was down to 175 pounds. (Thatis 47 pounds in just over 3 months!)
It was tedious. Itwas boring. But I was consistent!
Cue nursing school!
I wish I could sit here and say that in the next few months,I lost the remaining pounds and have been maintaining ever since. Sorry. That’s not my story.
Instead, I started nursing school. It was hard. My husband was still working out of town, only coming home for theweekends. I was stressed. I was overwhelmed. I ignored myself, and I definitely ignoredthe scale.
By the time I finished my first year of school, I finally faced the scale againand was discouraged and angry at myself. I was back up. Having to re-losewhat I worked so hard to shed.
So, in May 2012 I got re-focused AGAIN. I started walking, again! In July I decided I wanted to be a runneragain. I started with the C25K and thoughtI was going to DIE! When I ran 1 minutestraight I wanted to puke.
But I was consistent! (Are you catching a theme?)
Slowly, I’ve continued to tick pounds off. And just this week I hit 80 pounds lost!
Am I where I thought I’d be by this point? No. Ithink we all want to lose the weight as fast as humanly possible, or is thatjust me?
But here’s what I want you to take from my experience…..
1. It CAN be done! It can. I don’t care if you don’tlive by a gym, can’t afford a gym. Idon’t care if you are a single mom, a working mom, a working woman. We all have busy lives! We do. But you CAN choose to put your health first!
2. Consistency is the key! When you are consistent, results come. It’s really that simple. Some weeks it doesn’t feel that easy. Some weeks you feel you busted ass to loseand the scale is showing a gain! Thathappens. It happens to all of us! It’s frustrating and infuriating! But all you can control is YOUR ACTIONS! Be consistent and the results will alwayscome…maybe not on your watch, but they will come!
3. If you fall, don’t stay on the floor. First, I’m ¾ a nurse and that’s justgross…ewww, germs! Seriously though, ifyou haven’t fallen down along your weight loss journey I commend you. (And I also caution you, because IT WILLHAPPEN!) The key to success is GETTINGUP ONE MORE TIME THAN YOU FALL!
4. You deserve this! I truly mean that from the bottom of myheart. I realize I don’t know yourspecific story or situation, but I know you deserve happiness. And I know you deserve health! You are strong, use that strength to surpriseyourself!
Wow. I mean wow. I love Alisha, but this post made me love her even more. Be sure to stop by her blog and tell her how much she's inspired you (and let her know I sent you!) http://inprogressforgood.blogspot.com/